The Odessa Tapes: Part IV (How to Get a Girl to Fall in Love With You)

This is how you win the game of retention… for the rest of your life.

No, this is not a misleading title.

There is a way you can get a girl to fall in love with you.

There are actionable steps you can take that will enable you to solidify a relationship.

And I can teach them to you.

That’s right. I can teach you how to get a girl to fall in love with you.

You are in good hands.

My biggest strength in the dating game is my ability to get significant emotional investment from the girl (early too).

It’s not my ability to go out and bang a bunch of hot chicks.

And it’s not my ability to slang it.

It is my ability to keep a girl and have her develop strong feelings for me.

That’s one of the perks that come along with true social freedom.

If you want to know how to get a girl to fall in love with you… READ ON.

You Must Know How and When to “Play Ball”

Many anonymous internet sources give horrible advice on dating or game.

Why else do guys waste years of their lives writing on forums and thousands of dollars on pick-up products with nothing to show for it?

It’s because most sources are not credible sources.

They do not have actual experience getting women to fall in love with them.

All they know how to do is go out and trick girls into liking them… relying on things such as buying temperature and good logistics.

Eventually, the girl figures out that the dude sucks and drops him.

One of the most misunderstood topics is the concept of “the alpha male” or how to be an alpha male.

Granted there are some credible sources that give great information on the subject.

But in general, most sources get this concept completely wrong.

They believe that being an alpha male entails being dominant at all costs.

As a result, they try to be cocky/funny or just an asshole and they think this will keep the girl.

They are wrong.

Sometimes you have to play ball.

It’s good to be confident and tease a chick but you also have to be willing to go along with what she wants or do things that she wants.

That’s called playing ball and it adds up over time.

Bottom Line: You want to be running the show the majority of the time, doing what you want. But throw her a bone here and there.

Show her what you are passionate about.

When are you at your best?

You are at your best when you are happiest.

And more likely than not, you are happiest when you are doing what you love.

That’s when your light shines brightest in the Universe.

That’s when you are most attractive to people.

This is the time to have your girl with you.

Include her in your reality of peaked happiness.

This will bring her happiness too and will help solidify that bond.

Take her on vacation.

I would say that women tend to project relationships more than men, meaning that they will constantly be wondering “How far will this go?”

Although I have come in contact with a lot of guys that fall into this generally feminine behavior.

Either way, if you want to solidify a relationship or even speed up her emotional investment… then take her on vacation.

There’s something about traveling going to different places together.

It builds up the experiences and shared history that you have together.

A part of their little fantasy mindset literally sees it as you guys having been on a journey together.

Actually BE THE PRIZE.

A lot of PUA material floats some garbage about prize frame.

All you need to do is tell yourself that you are the prize or that you are enough.

That’s bullshit.

Sure you might be able to lie to yourself.

You might even be able to bullshit the girl for a little bit.

But eventually they come to their senses and bounce.

My solution: Why don’t you actually become the prize?

Why don’t you just put in the work and be the best man you can be?

Instead of “faking it until you make it” why not just become the shit?

That way you don’t have to lie to yourself or lie to the girl.

The relationship will be a lot more genuine and enjoyable for everyone.

People always ask  “What is the highest level of game?” or “How will I know when I get there?”

Here is the answer:

The ultimate goal (or level) is when you can get and keep women on a consistent basis with no lies, no gimmicks, no tactics. Just straight up being genuine and honest… and them becoming emotionally invested in that. If you can do that, you don’t need anybody’s help.

Grown Man Vibe

Grown man vibe ties it all together.

It is the nail in the coffin.

Women don’t fall for little boys.

They fall for grown men.

Why do a lot of hot girls date older men?

The money, the experience, the calmness… Wrap all of that up and you have grown man vibe.

Grown man vibe means that you are a grown man and it is reflected in your thoughts words and actions.

It is reflected in how you move through the Universe.

You are all alone, completely self-sufficient.

You are out of the house and completely support yourself financially.

You can make decisions.

The good. The bad. The ugly.

No matter the situation, you will deal with it consulting yourself first.

This gives you a certain magnetism that women (by nature) must go to.

With grown man vibe (in addition to actually being the prize), there is no such thing as “losing the girl.”

Click play to hear me go through the list and talk about personal examples for each of the major points in the article.

If you want to download the podcast to your device click here. To stream the podcast just click the “play” button shaped like an arrow.

1:03- Is it possible to get a girl to fall in love with you?

2:17- The most important time in a relationship.

2:39- Importance of setting boundaries.

3:18- What happens when boundaries are not set?

4:58- Summer 2008 Girlfriend- example of playing ball

6:38- Misunderstanding the term “alpha male”

7:28- Your reasons = When you are at your best.

8:02- My “best” relationship example.

10:17- Take her on vacation.

10:49- Women constantly project relationships.

11:35- Vacations speed up the process of emotional investment.

13:18- Actually be the prize.

14:26- Underlying belief of the community.

16:12- Don’t be a knockoff.

16:43- What is the highest level of game?

17:32- The Importance of grown man vibe.

18:30- Why women like older men.

19:14- How to get grown man vibe.


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The Odessa Tapes: Part III (Speed Read Women and Increase Retention)

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The Odessa Tapes: Part V (The #1 Way to Get Powerful Friends)



  1. […] The Odessa Tapes: Part IV (How to Get a Girl to Fall in Love With You) […]

  2. Curse
    July 29, 2014 at 2:50 pm — Reply

    According to grown man vibe, I have a question. I understand that you are fully supporitng yourself, but I wonder what kind of job do you have. Are you working in the internet or maybe you have 9-5 job? Or maybe even your own business? I’m just curious.

    • July 31, 2014 at 6:14 am — Reply

      I have a job.

  3. Tatu
    July 30, 2014 at 2:49 am — Reply

    the topics ur touching on are great! thanks –

    • July 31, 2014 at 6:15 am — Reply

      thanks bro!

  4. Theo
    July 30, 2014 at 4:32 am — Reply


    I agree with a lot of what you say here. One thing i noticed, in particular, albeit many guys saying that it’s better to play a numbers game and move on if she’s not immediately interested, is that persistence can be off. Perhaps this in itself is a numbers game (more times you try etc..eventually one time you’ll hit the jack pot).

    I had a slightly irrelevant question for you. What would you recommend as supplements for anxiety/focus?

    • July 31, 2014 at 6:16 am — Reply

      I think as with any goal… you’re first priority should be to do it the natural way.

      So for anxiety/focus… put down the smartphone, turn off the tv, get out of the house. Start with that first.
      If you can, try going cold turkey on technology.

    July 31, 2014 at 1:35 pm — Reply

    If you were having great relationships with some of these women, why did you break them off? Are you still in the “dating around” phase or did something turn you off from it?

    Or she broke it off?

    • August 1, 2014 at 3:00 am — Reply

      Because in you late teens/early 20’s I don’t think it’s to your benefit to spend too long in a relationship… just my personal belief.
      I truly believe you should be getting learning experiences every way possible so that if and when you decide to settle down you’re not left clueless not being able to figure women out.

      get a girlfriend… get a rotation… go out to get laid… approach chicks during the day… get your heart broken… break a chicks heart… You put the odds in your favor significantly if you have a lot of experience doing a lot of shit.

  6. Tatu
    August 1, 2014 at 2:24 am — Reply

    hey sonny,

    i was curious what you think a short asian guy can do to be the type of guy girls sleep with asap/ or are crazy for.. instead of being the guy they date for a long time.
    and how do i find out if this girl im dating will have sex if she keeps stopping my advances. i dont want to be the guy that she keeps around and doesnt have sex with, but is just an emotional support. but we do touch and cuddle/ kiss.

    we talked about social circle before and grown man vibe. what else would u say

    • August 1, 2014 at 3:19 am — Reply

      For a short Asian guy… it’s more of a conditional/environmental and upbringing thing.

      Being that guy is not your natural state because of a traditional Asian upbringing (correct me if I’m wrong).

      Pick up/cold approaching chicks will not fix that.

      You need to be conditioned being around a cool social circle made up of predominantly white guys….

      As of now, you sort of fit the bill of stereotypical Asian…. chicks don’t necessarily associate that with sleep with the guy right away.
      Like I said, you need to start by distancing yourself from that stereotype… do all the right shit such as lifting weights, dressing a little hood, and being talkative.

      Now you gotta take it to the next level with the people you associate with.

      My Dad is a stereotypical Asian but he killed it in the 80s with white chicks based off who he associated with… he’s also very aggressive.

      With that chick it sounds like shes gonna make you wait a while or she’s just stringing you along.

      • Tatu
        August 1, 2014 at 11:52 pm — Reply

        nice, thanks for breaking it down for me. it makes a lot of sense when you put it that way –

        • August 2, 2014 at 2:45 am — Reply

          Yea man. Thanks for your questions.

  7. […] the total package. Get women to fall in love with […]

    September 13, 2014 at 10:12 pm — Reply

    Hey Sonny,

    Nice post here. A lot of this makes great sense. You’l notice that PUA’s often speak in a way that let’s you know they’re not investing a lot in getting the girl to invest in them (if that makes any sense), and they don’t even have a vibe that would make you think a chick would want to invest in them. It’s a lot like a company. Girls should look at your company and go, “whoa, I wanna buy stock in Sonny or Fortis!” Nerdy analogy, but I tend to think in finite terms.

    Thanks for this post,


    • September 14, 2014 at 1:48 am — Reply

      PUA’s often ignore the obvious problems such as physical appearance or any lingering emotional problems from their younger years.

      PUA’s also miss the point… making the game as easy as possible for yourself.

      All my friends that are into PUA used to downplay the chicks I got saying “it’s just because chicks are physically attracted to you” or “you met her through social circle”

      that’s the point… why try for women when you can set yourself up so that they are handed to you on a platter.

  9. September 20, 2014 at 1:29 am — Reply

    Nice man thanks

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